Lots of us have been attending high school graduations lately, while many more of us have not. Still, whether very new or faded into sepia by time, we all share cherished graduation memories.
We can report that the many 2018 school graduation ceremonies we’ve attended in recent weeks were mostly like the ones preceding them, looking as far back as 100 years at local high schools.
But there were defining differences, too. For instance, we doubt that mass killings on America’s school campuses were mentioned at past ceremonies like we heard repeated at ceremonies this year.
This season, Sonoma County’s school graduations include passages about the historic wildfires that disrupted orderly school routines in the middle of the year and saw families, teachers and neighbors lose homes and personal belongings.
At Windsor, Geyserville, El Molino, Analy and other schools last week, proud parents watched their sons and daughters march across the graduation stage to receive their diplomas. Cloverdale and Healdsburg will march this week.
Relief, no doubt, is mixed with pride and many other emotions. Families as new as one or two generations removed from Mexico, or as old as five generations from the same apple or livestock ranch, are sharing the same moment and the newest lifelong memory.
Is there a single graduation wish all parents, teachers and students seek or celebrate? What have we been preparing these graduates for that has taken 12 years of formal education? To go to college or start a career? Be self-supportive and a law-abiding citizen? Could it be as simple a wish as to just “be happy?”
Actually, we have not heard the word “happy” used that much in this year’s graduation speeches. These are not the happiest of times, we hear our newest graduates tell us in their speeches. Besides wildfires and school shootings, these students are talking about hate and prejudice against skin color, same-sex individuals and ugly political divides.
But we don’t hear voices of dejection or defeatism. Time and again, we hear these young voices call for action and change. Keynote speaker Mike McGuire, our state senator, challenged the Windsor High School graduates to go out and “take ownership of this new century.” It was as if he was saying that happiness might have to wait.
In truth, very few people can define what it takes to make themselves happy, anyway. Certainly a high school diploma can make you happy, but that moment doesn’t really last that long, does it?
Most people say money makes them happy. But, then again, just about everybody lives their entire life saying they never have enough money. Some people say time is more important than money.
The problem with happiness may be it is not something you go out and find; it is something you have to make. Is happiness getting good grades in high school, or is it more about having a rewarding experience?
Our youngest graduates, the members of the Class of 2018, all have known happy moments, even through the times of our wildfires and nasty national politics. Friends, games, shared music, surprises and gathered memories all breed happiness.
If we knew the answers ourselves, we could teach our high school students how to be happy. We know genetics and inherited life circumstances — including a person’s zip code, level of poverty and family history — make the biggest impacts on happiness.
But students who are earning a diploma know something more important. They know they can make things happen. They can make a difference. They can change themselves and they can change each other. That means they can change the world.
It turns out that the happiest people on earth are the people most engaged in making other people happy. We think we are hearing the 2018 graduates admit that being happy is not easy. But we’re sure we also heard them say it will be worth it.
