Civil Talk

When sincerity, candor and straight talk are abandoned we all
lose. Wherever compromise, confession and concession are avoided
everyone fails together. Without honest disagreement, cordial
conversation and simple civility common sense and native
intelligence can not prevail.
We know because so much of our current public debate and today’s
matters of government prove all this.
We now have a monstrosity of national health care reforms that
no one can understand — and for which very few wish to claim
authorship. We are set to engage in a bitter dialogue as the only
way to elect a new district attorney and board of county
supervisors.
Honorable discourse, unvarnished facts and plain words have
become sure signs of weakness. To win a debate or a vote it takes
blustering, yelling and distraction. Worse, you go “negative.”
What do we have to owe for all this loss of civility? This curse
is so obvious that we encounter it everywhere. All our government
is drenched in harsh partisanship. Democrats and Republicans in
Sacramento and our Nation’s Capitol speak of one another in open
disgust — and even hatred. Our entertainment media is full of
vulgar and cheap humor. Even many of our own private conversations
are less than polite.
We have not only unlearned how to debate or disagree, we have
forgotten how to talk to one another. We spin, push poll,
fillibuster, demonize and tell lies. We never, ever admit a
mistake. Weakness, always remember, is admitting someone might have
a better answer.
We have just witnessed what may become a great day of national
history, with the passing of major national health care reform that
will allow all sick children to have medical insurance. Millions of
other uninsured Americans might now have the same sense of security
and health treatments the rest of us have taken for granted for
generations.
In a country founded on the principles of majority rule and open
dissent, what is the response of the Republican Party to this
milestone legislation? They are seeking to sue their own
government, knowing they will not prevail.
Imagine what better health care reforms we could have had if
civility and honest debate had been allowed and employed. Room to
compromise and words of conciliation is how to make even better
choices and agreements.
Closer to home, we witnessed the first face-to-face debate
between our two District Attorney candidates, Stephan Passalacqua
and Jill Ravitch. These are two highly qualified and experienced
attorneys, members of a profession that demands high ethics and
forthright character.
So how did these two address one another?  With charges of “hog
wash,” “baloney” and “cheap shots.” In between the verbal spars,
the two did offer more positive statements about how they will
serve as our county’s chief prosecutor and criminal justice
official. Agree or disagree, just stick to facts and leave out the
personal attacks.
Sticking to facts and avoiding personal attacks is a good
instruction for life, but apparently it won’t win you an
election.
With 10 weeks still to go in the North County race for
supervisor between Debora Fudge and Mike McGuire, the race to go
“negative” is apparently already over. Each candidate’s camp is
accusing the other of “going negative” first, apparently to allow
someone to go negative second.
Fudge, McGuire, Passalacqua and Ravitch are decent and honorable
people who have served honorably and unselfishly in public office.
They are equal victims to the rest of us in this loss of our
civility and politeness.
So long as yelling louder, unyielding mistakes and name calling
grabs attention (and headlines), good men and women will resist
honest discourse and refined debate. We might need a new winning
strategy but there is none in sight.
Remember when saying, “I’m sorry” once meant “I love you?” Let’s
not get silly.
— Rollie Atkinson