A day in the life of raising two teenagers is always interesting. You never know what kind of mood they will be in, or if they are going to be a functioning human being that day or not. It’s kind of like testing the waters each morning.
I usually start off by asking them how they slept, what time they went to bed and who they last texted. That last question seems to be the most telling of all. Who they last talked to the night before sets the mood for the following day. An obvious inconvenience for parents. If only all conversations could end in rainbow and unicorn emojis.
After my teens had a couple of moody days during the holiday break, I got to thinking about the ups and downs of texting. Back in my teenage years we only had the house phone, or landline. I guess the cordless came into use at some point. I can still hear my mom yelling at me to get off the phone each night. Ah, such wonderful memories of my defiant 15-year-old self.
I too, just like my teens, was obsessed with my friends and peer gossip. In retrospect, talking on the phone each night to my friends was very important to me. The only difference between myself and my teens is that I didn’t have the power of words at my fingertips. When I ended a call at night, that was it. The conversation was over. As we all know, that’s not the way it works anymore.
Case in point: a few days ago I saw my son feverishly typing on his phone, and assuming it was a heated text conversation, I said to him, “Just call her. Stop texting and talk to her in person. Whatever the issue, it probably would be better solved if you just called her.”
Later on I asked him about what happened and he explained to me that he didn’t know how to interpret her text. He couldn’t decide if it was negative or positive. Even as I write this, I’m shaking my head in disbelief of how silly things have gotten. No wonder there are times that I want to go screaming into the hills. But, this is our world now and my teen’s reality. It also brings me to my other point.
In this new age of texting we have had to learn how to interpret the voice of the text. I believe this is hard for teenagers. I think it is really easy for them to constantly misread texts and not communicate properly. I see it my house all the time. How can you be in a foul mood and correctly interpret a text?
The phrase “whatever” can have several meanings. It can be a laid back term or it can be interpreted as standoffish, as can a million other words. So, I try nicely to say to my teens that the next time you think you got a mean text, just take a minute to reread it. Don’t jump down anyone’s throat, just take it easy and simply pick up the phone and call them. Problem solved, right? If only it were that simple. Fellow parents, it’s just so complicated out there. The world of cyber communication is a tricky one. I’ll admit that I do text people, but if I want a real conversation, I pick up the phone.
I hope this generation and more to come embrace talking to a live person. There would be so much less confusion and guesswork. And isn’t it lovely to hear the voice of a loved one or friend? Kudos to our generation that all we ever did was write notes, in cursive writing that we learned in school.
I always appreciated the love note my boyfriend left on my car windshield. Now, that was romantic and always made my day. Much better than a heart text. I know what you’re thinking, it’s time for me to embrace the current times. OK, OK, I’ll get there, but it doesn’t mean I have to like it.
Elizabeth Knobel lives in Windsor and is the mother of two teens who give her inspiration everyday. She can reached at [email protected].
