Happy Holidays to everyone out there. As much as I enjoy Christmas, it can be a hectic time and I’m glad to be moving forward. I’m thankful that my family spent it together, in peace and that we all enjoyed each other’s company and savored our wonderful Christmas dinner.
A few weeks ago I wrote about my teen daughter and her unexpected bout of depression that clouded over her for a few weeks. It’s just this dreadful emotion that kind of creeps into your life, body and mind. I have since deemed it the “creeper.” It impacts the one you love and everyone around them. She is since much better, back to enjoying her life and friends. My daughter was lucky, as I have learned, and I am thankful that it didn’t turn into something more serious.
Yes, yes, I know that this is not the most cheeriest of topics coming after the holiday but I felt compelled to revisit it. My Mom has a dear friend who’s granddaughter has also been affected by the creeper. In her case, she did not escape its dark power and she tried to take her own life. This is an accomplished teenage young woman. High grades, good solid family, financially sound. Her parents thought all was well, no obvious signs of distress. She didn’t ask for help, didn’t reach out to anyone before it got too bad. To me, that is the most tragic part. She gave no one a warning, and she couldn’t fight her way out of her helplessness alone.
After two weeks in the hospital, she has slowly recovered. She is now in treatment, not going back to finish her freshman year of college, and will learn the tools to help her cope and understand what led to her that desperate decision. Thank goodness she was also lucky. Many, many teens are not. That is why I write this sad piece. I want every parent out there of a teenager, and a preteen, to watch for the signs of extreme sadness, loss of appetite, loss of drive and utter exhaustion. It can come out of nowhere, for reasons we don’t know or understand. It is a serious issue, one that we should all be aware of, and take very, very seriously.
I tend to watch my kids closely, I always have. I just intuitively feel a shift in behavior and routine. Something out of the ordinary catches my eye and I become a little more involved, and a lot more understanding. It has taken me a while to tune into the outside forces that invade our teenagers lives, the invisible pressure that us parents don’t see or hear. They are always present, on social media, 24 hours a day. The threat never, ever goes away, unless the phone does. It is a tough balancing act for them, and for us.
This last month I have learned that any life lesson is valuable if you have the ability to learn from it and move on happily. That is what I’m trying to teach my two teens, and will also pass on to my two younger children. Forging ahead into young adulthood carries many possibilities, some good, some bad. The future can be bright and it’s our job as parents to help guide them through as best we can.
So here’s to 2019. May it be a new, fresh, exciting year ahead for all. The second half of the school year, looking ahead to the spring and longer, warmer days. Endless possibilities, new experiences. I can’t wait to see what lies in store. Happy New Year and happy teenagers. What more could we ask?
Elizabeth Knobel lives in Windsor and is the mother of two teens who give her inspiration everyday. She can reached at [email protected].
